My desire to have sex is completely gone; someone help me find my mojo again!
It's a scary feeling to say the least and the worst part is the desperate feeling of helplessness. This isn't actually anything new for me, however, it's been awhile since the sexless rogue wave has hit leaving me numb and feeling incapable of stimulation. My worst bought with sexless was after I had kids. I was sleep deprived, breast feeding, and working full time, so the last thing I wanted to do at the close of my night was 'get it on'. If anything I wanted to get it off, my clothes that is, and go to bed! But my wifely duties called and I pushed through to the best of my ability. My children got older and things came back around for the most part. My husband left and my sex drive returned, tough trade-off, but it is what it is. My single years were rocky as recreational sex has never been my thing. I function best in a relationship and after eight long years of wandering aimlessly through single woman purgatory, I found a compatible and loving mate.
So when I woke up a few weeks ago and realized that I didn't want to be touched or fondled, I recognized the symptoms just as I would a cold or flu coming on. I immediately sat my guy down and confronted the issue head on. I wanted him to be aware first and foremost that I was fully acknowledging a change in my behavior. I wanted to reassure him that I was just as attracted to him as ever and that unfortunately I was succumbing to two nasty culprits that tend to remove my libido in an instant; excessive stress and anxiety. This dynamic duo is to blame for all of this. He and I talked and came to the conclusion that I am open to being intimate more so during the day, and that we would find a workaround until I felt back on track. He appreciated my willingness to compromise and reached back out to me with love and understanding and I appreciated his sympathetic and caring approach. There are many reasons why you may not be as frisky as normal. Whatever the reason(s) may be, be honest with yourself and then communicate with your mate openly.
Strategies to Consider:
- A blood test for low thyroid function and iron deficiency anemia, two common disorders that can affect sex drive.
- Discuss whether or not you may be suffering from low-level depression -- which can affect libido. If you are already taking an SSRI antidepressant drug, discuss switching to another type of medication, which won't dampen sex drive.
- Localized estrogen therapy. Placing estrogen directly into the vagina soothes vaginal tissue, and allows the secretions necessary for comfortable sex and possibly even an increase in sexual desire.
- Compounded testosterone cream. Many compounding pharmacies (they make medicines from scratch) offer testosterone creams and gels, but you'll need a doctor's prescription. They can be applied to the vagina to increase sensation, or to the clitoris to increase orgasm.
- Vitamin E. When used locally in the vagina it can help rehydrate tissue and may possibly increase sensation. No need for a prescription here; simply stick a pin in a vitamin E capsule and apply to the vagina several times a week, even if you're not having sex.
Before using supplements, you should first have a discussion with your doctor, as side effects or drug interactions can occur.
Words by Sid Powell
Source: Web MD